Title: The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
Author: Brené Brown, Ph.D., L.M.S.W.
I heard my podcast soul sista Andrea Owen chatting it up constantly on her podcast about Brené Brown’s work and how much it has influenced her and has helped her spread self-help love to her listeners.
Like I explain in this post, you know that Andrea’s podcast was one that inspired me to begin exploring self-help to better my own life.
Much of her advice has already dramatically changed my ways of thinking. Also, it has changed the way I go about relating to others. So, I trusted her when she recommended that her listeners read any and all of Brené Brown’s work.
I ordered The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are on Amazon and a day later I was already furiously highlighting like a mad woman. As I was writing I kept thinking, “OMG! This woman knowssssss me. I mean, she REALLY knows me!”
I loved it so much that I sent it to one of my closest friends.
Having this experience while reading this self-help book leads me to believe that many women, sadly enough, go through a lot of the pain and struggles that Brené describes.
Book Review: The Gifts of Imperfection
The Gifts of Imperfection Target Audience
The Gifts of Imperfection is for anyone who feels often they are not enough and that they need to “fix” all of their imperfections. Instead of being who you are, you feel the pressure of society wanting you to change to fit in.
This book is for people who constantly worry about what others think about them. For those who constantly feel the need to do things with people-pleasing intentions.
If you’re a recovering perfectionist, like myself, and you constantly worry about what others think of you, I HIGHLY recommend you buy The Gifts of Imperfection.
Buy…not borrow from the library.
Why? This is one you will want to highlight in and take notes. The amount of great quotes you will find are incredible. Since I have finished, I have already gone back to review some of my annotations when I need a pick-me-up in the middle of a not-so-great day.
Writing Style of The Gifts of Imperfection
Brené Brown structures The Gifts of Imperfection in a way that is super easy for her readers to digest.
There are 15 sections of the book and only 130 pages.
She provides a lot of information in this short self-help book and is careful to keep her readers interested. She does this by constantly dropping in her own personal stories of failure, heartache, as well as successes that make The Gifts of Imperfection relatable and real.
Also, you don’t have to worry about super sophisticated researcher language that makes you feel like you are in college again or that you need to stop and google words constantly.
She is a straight shooter and tells it like it is in simple, everyday language. When you read The Gifts of Imperfection, you feel like you’re having coffee with her or having a sneak peak at mini therapy sessions packed with simple, yet powerful advice.
Simply stated, she keeps it real and even provides broken down definitions throughout each section.
- Related: BOOK REVIEW: YOU ARE A BADASS
Key Points in The Gifts of Imperfection
The Gifts of Imperfection begins with an introduction the concept of Wholehearted Living, which she researched prior for many years. She wants her reader to understand that no matter what a day brings and how much you are able to complete, your ARE ENOUGH.
But, reading about it really makes you reflect on how hard you are on your own self every day. We often don’t celebrate what we accomplish – even little, baby victories . But, we really should in order to fill up our self-love tank.
Brown also explains the importance of the 3 C’s – Courage, Compassion, and Connection. These are seen throughout the 10 guideposts she presents throughout the rest of The Gifts of Imperfection.
- Related: 7 WAYS TO DEAL WITH STRESS & ANXIETY
Guideposts & Favorite Quotes in The Gifts of Imperfection
Cultivating Authenticity: Letting Go of What People Think
“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are…this is how we invite grace, joy, and gratitude into our lives” (Brown 50).
Cultivating Self-Compassion: Letting Go of Perfectionism
“Perfectionism never happens in a vacuum. It touches everyone around us. We pass it down to our children, we infect our workplace with impossible expectations, and it’s suffocating for our friends & families” (Brown 61).
Cultivating a Resilient Spirit: Letting Go of Numbing and Powerlessness
“Practicing critical awareness is about reality-checking the messages and expectations that drive the ‘never good enough’ gremlins” (Brown 67).
Cultivating Gratitude and Joy: Letting Go of Scarcity and Fear of the Dark
“We spend most of the hours and the days of our lives hearing, explaining, complaining, or worrying about what we don’t have enough of…we’re starving from a lack of gratitude” (Brown 83).
Cultivating Intuition and Trusting Faith: Letting Go of the Need for Certainty
“It’s our fear of the unknown and the fear of being wrong that create most of our conflict and anxiety” (Brown 90).
Cultivating Creativity: Letting Go of Comparison
“It’s easy to see how difficult it is to make time for the important things such as creativity, gratitude, joy, and authenticity when we’re spending enormous amounts of energy conforming and competing” (Brown 95).
Cultivating Play and Rest: Letting Go of Exhaustion as a Status Symbol and Productivity as Self-Worth
“Play shapes our brain, helps us foster empathy, helps us navigate complex social groups, and is at the core of creativity and innovation” (Brown 101).
Cultivating Calm and Stillness: Letting Go of Anxiety as a Lifestyle
“Anxiety is extremely contagious, but so is calm… Do we want to infect people with more anxiety, or heal ourselves and the people around us with calm?” (Brown 107).
Cultivating Meaningful Work: Letting Go of Self-Doubt and “Supposed To”
“Overcoming self-doubt is all about believing that we are enough and letting go of what the world says that we’re supposed to be and supposed to call ourselves” (Brown 115).
Cultivating Laughter, Song, and Dance: Letting Go of Being Cool and “Always in Control”
“[L]ife is way too precious to spend it pretending like we’re super-cool and totally in control when we could be laughing, singing, and dancing” (Brown 123).
Order Yours Now!
Like I said, I highly suggest you purchase this read over borrowing it. You will find yourself going back to reread your notes and highlights on days when you truly need it.
Take the time to invest in yourself.
You won’t regret it!
Do you have other self-help recommendations?